SCHOOL EDITION 29 MAY 2024 - Flipbook - Page 23
IN ASSOCIATION WITH
Business INsight
WEDNESDAY JANUARY 22 2020
business@irishnews.com
www.irishnews.com
23
Painstorming in the office
I
WAS reading an article recently about the evolution of
language and how so many
new words are introduced
each year, either formally via
the English Oxford Dictionary or informally, simply through everyday
usage.
We’ve had Brexit, Megxit and other
variations on a theme. There’s been
‘anticipointment’ (when something
you’ve looked forward to turns out
to be rubbish), ‘snaccident’ (when
you realise you’ve just eaten a full
pack of biscuits while watching TV)
and everyone loves a ‘cupset’ (just
like Wimbledon pulled off by winning the 1988 FA Cup Final against
Liverpool).
So on that note I thought I would
share some suggestions for HR related words that might work for folks in
the upcoming year:
Benchmurk: When you compare
your place of work with other, similar, companies and deliberately
fudge or obfuscate the results, so
things don’t look so bad.
Sappraisal: The meeting you have
at the end of the year where you and
your manager stare at each other
and try to think of nice things to say,
while slowly draining each other of
the will to live.
Boativation: Like Chris Janson sang
“money can’t buy everything, but it
can buy me a boat”. This reflects the
stage of life where everything you do
is motivated purely by the dream of
retirement (and metaphorically sailing away on your boat)
Workcation: When you bring the
HR MATTERS
Barry
Shannon
“Blamework: The
protective structure you
build at the start of every
project to make sure that
there is a range of other
people to take the fall
before you”
phone or laptop with you on vacation and end up doing more work by
the pool side than you did while in
the office.
Cruel-aid: Getting everyone to join
you in drinking a glass of pure negativity, so they crawl down into your
pit of misery and wallow there with
you.
Binnovation: This happens at a
meeting where everyone proposes
random, often totally impractical
ideas that you are forced to listen to
and consider, even though you know
they are going straight to the trash
afterwards: usually linked to ‘blue
sky thinking’
Painstorming: The agony you feel
taking part in a ‘binnovation’ session
Binergy: The final part of the trilogy: this is the energy you use up listening to and considering all those
useless ideas.
Methical: When the only way you
could possible justify what you are
doing as ‘the right thing’ is by being
high.
Blamework: The protective structure you build at the start of every
project to make sure that there is a
range of other people to take the fall
before you.
Doh-sess: A thoroughly pointless
process that is there just for the sake
of it, to make everyone’s life a little
more frustrating.
Milestun: The amazement you
feel when you realise today is the
day that someone totally useless
reached their first work anniversary
Chairvoyance: The enlightenment
you get (usually pretty early on)
during a meeting you are running
that tells you this is going to drag on
for hours and yet produce nothing
worthwhile at the end of it all.
Now maybe these will mean something to you and maybe they won’t,
but hopefully you won’t think they
fall under the category of ‘crydias’
(suggestions so awful they make you
burst into tears).
Barry Shannon (bshannon@cayan.
com) is HR director at Cayan in
Belfast
Stormont deadlock broken but
businesses uncertainty not over
W
HILE many will
be breathing a
sigh of relief that
the impasse at
Stormont has finally
broken and a Brexit bill has been
passed by the UK Parliament, the
uncertainty is by no means over
for business.
The Brexit bill gives businesses
some respite – but it doesn’t deliver
certainty, and in fact has created
uncertainty, in terms of NI/GB
trade.
Northern Ireland enjoys the
same access to the internal UK
market as the other regions and it
is vital that this remains.
As it stands, during the transition
period beginning 1 February 2020,
businesses in Northern Ireland can
continue to operate as usual when
it comes to trade with the EU and
the rest of the UK.
In the meantime, the UK
Government and EU 27 have less
than 12 months to agree a freetrade agreement that clarifies the
breadth and depth of the UK’s
future relationship with the EU and
delivers on the guarantee of our
‘unfettered’ access to the domestic
market.
Considering that most recent
EU agreements have taken,
on average, over five years to
negotiate, having less than one
year set aside by this Bill provides
a very narrow window for securing
BREXIT
STORMY WATERS:
Uncertainty
continues to hang
over trade between
Britain and the north
Ann
McGregor
“As it stands, during the
transition period beginning 1
February 2020, businesses in
Northern Ireland can continue
to operate as usual when it
comes to trade with the EU
and the rest of the UK”
a strong trade deal between the EU
and the UK, which will be vital to
protecting our economy and jobs.
Trading conditions are
challenging, particularly for
manufacturing. Results from NI
Chamber and BDO’s most recent
Quarterly Economic Survey paint
a sobering picture, showing that
almost 3 in 5 members believe the
NI economy will contract in 2020.
They were, however, more
positive about their own prospects,
with three-in-five predicting that
their own business will grow.
This is a glimmer of optimism,
which reflects the growing
aspirations we are witnessing
from many existing and potential
exporters.
We were therefore encouraged
by the references to trade and
export in the ‘New Decade, New
Approach’ deal.
As a trade and export focused
organisation, we welcome the focus
on investing in business growth for
the future.
While negotiations about future
trade continue, companies are
also getting to grips with new
International Commercial Terms
(Incoterms), which came into effect
at the start of January this year.
Incoterms are a set of rules
which define the responsibilities
of buyers and sellers under
sales contacts. Given that these
are the cornerstone of trading
internationally, it is vital that
exporters are familiar with the
revisions. In preparation for the
introduction of the 2020 rules, NI
Chamber’s international division
has already provided technical
training to over 100 export
businesses in this area.
We are also helping hundreds
of people to learn more about
customs declarations procedures,
to help them better understand
the customs requirements and
the possible implications of a post
Brexit environment.
In all scenarios, a smooth
transition to our future relationship
with the EU is essential.
After years of relentless
uncertainty, plummeting
investment and for some members
damage to their customer and
supplier base, it would be
intolerable for businesses to face
multiple and sudden changes
to their trading conditions over
the months and years ahead. We
cannot face another situation
where politics gets in the way of
progress.
Ann McGregor is chief executive
of the Northern Ireland Chamber
of Commerce and Industry