FINAL TSTO Lesa Dec 14.pdf - Flipbook - Page 44
Getting it over and done with
Unfortunately a lot of young people begin to see not having had sex
as a burden. Pressure for young people to have sex is real. The talk
in schools among friends often sets the standards for what is good
and bad sexual behaviour. This is why school programs can be so
powerful, as they can get young people thinking and talking about the
conflicting sets of rules about sex.
Sex is better when you
wait until you feel ready.
I was so off my face I didn’t know what I was doing
Among sexually active Australian secondary students, being
drunk was the most common reason given for having unwanted
sex.12 Being pressured by a sexual partner was the second most
common reason, which is why being drunk or affected by drugs
can confuse issues even further.
Lots of people combine sex and alcohol because it frees them
to admit to wanting sex and to seek sex. It is also a handy tool
for relieving yourself of personal responsibility for what happens.
Young people need opportunities to think about the consequences
of mixing alcohol and sex so they can reduce the chances of
getting into situations they can’t handle. A frank discussion about
first sexual experiences — the disappointments and the highlights
— might start them thinking how they might like to engineer their
own sexual lives.
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More tips for talking about sex from
Family Planning NSW
The thought of starting ‘The Talk’ about sex, sexual
health and sexuality with children might send some
parents running for the hills. It can be awkward and
difficult and, more likely than not, teenagers would
rather do their algebra homework than talk to mum,
dad or an aunt about sex. But it doesn’t have to be
this way. According to educators at Family Planning
NSW, parents should try to keep discussions with
children open and casual. There’s no need for a
single big ‘talk’.
Rather than asking direct questions, have topical
and informal chats where you can talk about issues
without judgement.
So, instead of saying, ‘Have you had sex?’ try
asking open questions such as: ‘What do you and
your friends think about 15 year olds having sex?’
This way young people are more likely to talk freely
and don’t feel as though they are being interrogated.
Although lots of the issues surrounding sex and
sexual health are very serious, it’s OK to have a
giggle and to keep things lighthearted.
‘Often the best way to deal with difficult topics is with
a bit of humour. It’s also important to focus on the
positive side of sex, as well as the risks.’
