Minimalist Gossip Magazine Cover (49).pdf (13) - Flipbook - Page 44
'I am not afraid of you, you wretched hound!’
The beast laughed, ‘It’s precisely this courage that I seek!
For the profit of your sins has been the cost of the meek.
Do not worry, Obadiah, I will not leave you out of sorts,
in return for your courage, I should gladly give you aught.’
The Damnbitch it seems, was a virtue eating creature,
and what it wanted from Obadiah was his one redeeming feature.
In exchange for his courage, he’d have anything he’d need,
though only one consolation Obadiah could concede.
‘Fair then, beastly creature, seems you leave me but a choice!
But since you ask me for my price then you must heed my voice;
let me be admired and adored by all maidens near and far,
for in place thereof my courage, I’d say love was near on par.’
The Damnbitch replied, ‘Well, that seems a level trade!’
Then offered up a claw, shook the deal that they had made,
and with a roar and a laugh that made the heavens gently quake,
Obadiah’s only virtue, The Damnbitch did then take.
The next morning the whole encounter seemed like a distant dream,
Obadiah rose chipper, not a difference it would seem,
but as he went to break his fast, he was taken by surprise,
his wife spread bare upon their table; a lustful glimmer in her eyes,
‘Take me Obadiah. Take me any way you please!’
But Obadiah felt a sinking and a tremble in his knees.
When he stepped up to the table, he felt something stay behind,
‘I don’t know what’s come over me,’ he nervously replied.
He awkwardly excused himself and rushed into the street,
but every woman he crossed paths with simply lay down at his feet.
They’d plead and beg and grab at him with frightful, frantic hands,
they’d not take his excuses, nor his reprimands.
They’d corner him, manhandle him, they had to have their way!
His wants were neither here nor there, he did not have a say,
and should they try to force the deed in spite him yelling ‘Stop!’
He’d face the disappointment that the critics call a flop.
So, beware ye greedy gentlemen for when you reach your lot,
39
