The Inner Critic - Flipbook - Page 40
8. And what about the criticised?
Arguably the Inner Critic only has a place because there is some part of you ‘available’ to be criticised.
How then can we give the same care and attention to the part being criticised as we do the critic?
It is, after all another part to be acknowledged and most likely a part of us that has been ignored,
buried, exiled even, for fear of being ridiculed, hurt, rejected.
It’s most likely tender, and a part that we have lost touch with. The Inner Critic layers over the top of it
as a protective shield. And in this way, we may need to ask the critic, with kindness and compassion if
it can step away for a moment in order that the tender, exiled part may come forwards.
It maybe that even after creating the space, this tender part isn’t yet ready to come forwards.
It
maybe fearful, perhaps not wanting to be felt or observed. All of that is OK. Just let it be with kindness
and compassion. In time, it will come.
When working with a critical part of my own once, I discovered that actually there was a part of me that
didn’t want my critic to leave at all. In fact, as much as I didn’t care for what it had to say to me, to have
it leave, in that moment was far more anxiety provoking.
The part that the critic was protecting was not ready to be present in my life. Acknowledging just that
however, produced some sort of inner shift and I can no longer recall any of what the critic was saying,
or what it was protecting. Something moved inside.
So contrary to many other aspects of life, the key is not to ‘push’ for a change. To let it be, to observe,
be patient, be kind and wait. This in and of itself, will produce an inner shift, an evolution in some way.
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