BBC premarital counseling booklet-1 - Flipbook - Page 42
1.
No in-law interference can damage a sound marriage. In-laws cannot drive a wedge
between husband and wife who stand firm together.
2.
The policy to adopt is to make it clear that you want to be friendly and you want to work
for harmony between the generations, but you will not tolerate unwarranted
interferences in your marriage. This must be made clear with no compromise.
3.
A confrontation or discussion should be followed up by sincere and genuine attempts to
be friendly and conciliatory. You can behave lovingly towards them even if you don’t
feel loving, the action needs to promote the feeling. It will help and encourage your
spouse if you make a real effort in this direction. Experience shows that this policy can,
in time, achieve a surprising degree of success.
4.
If you and your in-laws really have very little in common, short visits from time to time
are best.
5.
Remember, family ties cannot be broken, and they last throughout a lifetime. Even if
your relationships with your in-laws are not as they should be right now, a time may
come when you may need their help, or they might need yours.
From “Premarital Counseling” by Norman Wright
1.
Treat your in-laws with the same consideration and respect that you give to friends who
are not in-laws.
2.
When in-laws take an interest in our life and give advice, do just as you would if any
friend gave advice. If it is good, follow it. If it is not good, accept it graciously and then
ignore it.
3.
Remember that many times when the in-laws appear to be too concerned with your
affairs, they are not trying to interfere in your life, but are sincerely interested in your
welfare.
4.
Look for the good points in your in-laws.
5.
When you visit your in-laws, be as thoughtful, courteous, and helpful as you are when
you are visiting friends.
6.
When you visit your in-laws, make the visits reasonably short.
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