American River Review 2019 - Flipbook - Page 63
Reflections of an Ocean
Stephanie Parsons
“I don’t want to be here anymore, Jeffrey.” She tossed a
handful of stones from the cliffside as a child would cast
balls into a bucket: halfheartedly and without purpose.
“Then don’t.”
“There’s nowhere else to go.” As she sighed, Railey
lifted her head back to view a tall space between them
and the stars. “Do you ever wish that the world could
always feel this big?”
“What do you mean?”
“When you’re able to see the stars, you realize how
small you are, then morning comes and everything feels
claustrophobic again.”
“I guess that’s why they call it ‘mourning.’” Jeffrey
smiled at his joke. “You know, ‘cause you miss the
night?” Railey was still silent. “No?”
Railey frowned. “I guess.” She closed her eyes and
rested the back of her head against the rocks and listened
to the ocean as it crashed against the cliff. The waves had
called to her more than once.
“How long do you think it would take you to drown?”
“Stop it, Railey, I’m not talking about this with you.”
Railey caught Jeffrey’s eyes with a glare. “Whatever.”
“I’m going home.”
“Fine.”
“Your grandma’s probably worried about you. You
should go home too.”
Railey laughed.
“Okay, well, your mom is at least. I’ll walk you back.”
“I didn’t hear her car come home. I’m fine. I’ll wait.”
Jeffrey paused. He watched Railey as her frown turned
back into a smile. He often wondered what she was think-
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