American River Review 2019 - Flipbook - Page 64
ing. Railey’s complexity often felt like a reflection of the
night sky above them mixed with as much mystery as
held by the ocean. She was still undressed, her skin turning red as the rocks dug into her. Yet, her beauty didn’t
distract him from the time, which was growing heavier.
“Railey, I have to go. Let me walk you back.”
“Go. I’m staying here until my mom gets home.”
Her eyes closed again, leaving a lingering smile spread
across her face. After another moment of watching her
chest rise and fall in time with the waves, Jeffrey went to
leave. As he walked home, he stopped in front of Railey’s
house. He heard the dialogue that blared from Railey’s
grandmother’s television. Their house had become a time
machine, with the knobs on the television being a reminder that time was not linear. Jeffrey looked back for a brief
second toward the cliffs, to see if Railey was walking
towards him, but was greeted by a blurred outline of trees
and rocks.
Jeffrey continued home to a place where the televisions
had remotes, parents arrived home at five, and their house
would be quiet by ten. The dishwasher would already be
running, his father snoring, and his mother reading his
sister a bedtime story. He would be able to quietly slip
through the door unnoticed, without question, and would
soon be dreaming of Railey’s dark hair brushing across
his skin.
...
Railey opened her eyes to find herself alone. She
wasn’t aware of how long it had been since Jeffrey left.
The waves, again, called to her their endless song. This
particular one was her favorite. The crashing sounds
told a story of a life where she was not considered a
whore, where her mother was usually home, where her
grandmother was mentally stable, and her life was one
filled with unshattered hope. Her pulse quickened at the
thought of letting the ocean’s story end.
Then don’t.
To Railey, the waves were becoming faint from the distortion of memories playing in her head. Railey remembered the first time she ever heard the sound of crashing
tides. Her father took her to a lake. They had been attending a funeral for her father’s biological mother, who he
only just recently met. On their way to a ceremony, filled
with unfamiliar faces and uncomfortable conversations,
the two stopped at a motel in the northern part of Lake
Tahoe. They spent a few hours walking the sidewalks
and shorelines, stopping every few minutes to stare at the
strange landscape set before them.
“This is where I’d want us to live,” Railey remembered
her father whispering. He had wrapped his arms around
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American River Review
her small body and brought her to stand in front of him.
During the extravagant dinners, expensive jewelry exchanges, and nightly bedtime readings, Railey never felt
comfortable around her father. Several years had passed,
but she could still feel fingers tracing her waist as panic
rose in her chest. His slow kiss on her lips, lingering more
than normal.
When she looked into the unending horizon, she was
no longer standing on a shoreline. Railey sailed away
to places unknown, where hands could not feel her and
voices could not reach.
As the memory brought tears, Railey rose to her feet,
her body sore from laying bare on the ground. The distance between her and the ocean didn’t seem far anymore.
Her depth perception had blurred in the darkness.
Railey’s vague smile returned to her face.
...
“Mom, I’m home!”
The television was blaring loudly as it always was.
“Mom!”
“Oh, hello, dear. How was work?”
“It was alright, the contracts with my clients are a mess
though. Work never stops, does it?”
“Well, that’s nice.”
“Mom, can you turn that down please?”
“What?”
“The television: can you turn it down?”
“The heater isn’t on, dear.”
“No, Mom, the television.”
“I’m sorry, I just can’t seem to understand what you’re
saying.”
Carol sighed and put the groceries down in the kitchen.
She walked abruptly by her mother, who sat in a chair
with a sun hat on top of her head. As Carol turned the volume down, her head started to clear a little more. There
was a reason she hadn’t brought a television with them
when she and her daughter moved. The sound jostled her
nerves. Carol needed her senses in order to function. She
was convinced that this is why her mother had lost all of
hers so quickly.
With her eyes still glued to the flashing screen, Carol’s
mother remarked, “Oh good! I can hear you now!”
Carol sighed. “When did Railey get home today?”
“Who?”
